Come Sweet Christmas! 

It’s the second Christmas without my son, Jay and it seems harder instead of easier. Last year I was still in shock. Numb, having just lost my son and my mother. Functioning but not living.

Grief is a hard journey and it’s different for everyone. Lately my mother often comes to mind. And yes, I understand it’s because I put off grieving her death. At the time my mom slipped into heaven, I was spending every minute of the day and night in ICU with Jay. Praying! Interceding! Begging God for a miracle for my son. My mother would have understood.
But I don’t want grief to define me. I want my life to have purpose and joy and to honor those who loved me dearly but are now in heaven. And I don’t want to miss the love of family and friends who are here with me, but I also want them to realize that at this time in my life there is always someone missing—Jay.

Sometimes celebrations are tough for those of us in grief. Yes, we want to be happy and excited for holidays but it can still be hard. Shopping and parties are just not part of our DNA right now and wrapping presents often reminds us of all the gifts we wrapped for loved ones no longer with us. But here’s the deal. It’s not the real Christmas we find difficult to celebrate. It’s the commercial one. The lights, the music, the festivities often remind us of what we truly miss and want.

To me, the real Christmas isn’t about presents and Santa. It’s about Jesus Christ. “It’s the reason for the season,” as some say. That’s the Christmas I choose to celebrate. Yes, I miss my son, Jay, along with my husband, Carl and other family members. But I rejoice in a resurrected Savior who sacrificed his life for me. The King of Kings and Lord of Lords who wants to bless us all with love, joy and peace.

So Come Sweet Christmas Come!