In Other Words with Dave 

I’m pretty good at sitting and reclining. I may even be an expert, as evidenced by our worn-out sectional in the den. This gray-green, low-slung beauty has been a trooper. It hugged us through the pandemic, provided much-needed rest through my chemo treatments, and was our companion through countless binge-worthy (and not-so-binge-worthy) Netflix series. On slow Sunday mornings, it was our read-the-news nesting spot and in football season, our family gathering place for Chiefs games. Sectional, we salute you. Service complete. Time for a new couch. 

Furniture shopping. Oh, joy. After checking out our local furniture options, we head south to “shopper stalker” territory. At each furniture mega-store, a helpful salesperson greets us. And at each store, we politely interrupt their discourse, and introduce ourselves as “not today buyers.” Alison then recites some loosely quoted Dave Ramsey wisdom – and finally, we demonstrate our fiscal commitment with a classic spousal pinky promise. We are left alone. 

We aren’t searching for just any couch. In the past, we were “style over comfort” shoppers. With age comes wisdom and more frequent body aches. Our current customer demographic is somewhere between firm, supportive seat depth and not quite ready for motion furniture with cup holders. We have a couple of acres to sort through. 

The rest of the afternoon is a blur of beige, greige, white, and off-white sectional selections. And soon my posterior portion loses its keen ability to discern firmness and comfort. With numb butt setting in, we head home to our familiar slouchy sectional. After arranging a ridiculous amount of pillows to support our tired selves, we settle in to watch the Chiefs. With our halftime sponsored by ibuprofen.